The Birds And The Bees…Whens The Right Time To Talk?

The big talk, dreaded by most parents or sometimes completely avoided if possible.

When is the ‘right time’ to talk about our kid’s private parts and what they should be calling them, where baby’s come from and the dreaded P word…puberty.?

As parents sometimes you forget that your children are growing older and the older they’re getting the closer they’re to hitting puberty, the closer they are to being sexually active. It’s a scary thought to most.

So is there a ‘right age’?

Personally, I think no but I do however think the talk should be done before puberty so around 9-11 years old, the sooner the better.

I’ve seen a number of opinions on age range of this debate and one I do quite like the idea of is introducing the ‘Birds and Bees’ over the years and keeping it age appropriate with your explanations.

Kids are pretty clever and pick up on things fast, so say babies for instance. Not every child is going to believe the stork brings them forever, they soon become wise and realise they grow inside mummy’s tummy. That could be because they’ve seen for themselves with younger siblings, a friend told them or they’ve seen it on TV. They’ll then want to know how babies are made.

We all know that opens a whole new can of worms. This can make parents feel extremely awkward. Do you tell them the truth or tell a fib? Personally, I think the truth is best but again, done in an age-appropriate way so you don’t overwhelm them. If they’re old enough to ask, they should be told.

Personally, I’d rather the answers to my children’s questions regarding sex, birth, puberty all that malarky comes from me or a professional from school. Kids like to talk and laugh about the S word at school and that information shared can be wrong. How many of us believed in secondary school that the pull out method was 100% safe because so and so from year 11 said so? Yeah, no. Rather avoid that.

So what about the topics that kids may not be overly curious about such as puberty?

I think this should be discussed sooner then parents think, especially with girls. Talking about menstruation needs to be done early. Especially now with some girls having periods as young as 6! It can be scary to be hit with seeing blood if you have no clue what a period is. If a girl knows they can prepare.

There is nothing wrong with boys learning about this too as they can understand how girls work and what they go through. Of course, boys have their own issues at that age like wet dreams and erections which… Start dead early, in the womb in fact! (Yes, its crazy babies can have erections. It is weird to see at first but it’s only natural at the end of the day)

So overall I think the earlier birds and bees are spoken about the better. I do like the idea of starting at around 4 where your child is discovering themselves and different body parts and then work on from there through the years, done appropriately of course! For me personally I don’t want it to be an embarrassing subject, because it’s not. It’s natural and it happens to everyone, we all hit puberty and we all have sex so why should we be embarrassed to talk about it and give off the impression it’s something to be ashamed about?

But to actually answer the main point of this question there is no right age, it’s when you as a parent are ready to discuss or let a professional too. We all parent differently. So what may seem the right time to discuss this subject in one family won’t be the same for another.

So it’s over to you guys to discuss, I did a poll over on Twitter and Instagram for this debate and the highly rated age was 9-11 years old. Which as far as I know is when schools aim to cover this subject. Pretty sure it was a similar age for when it was covered when I were in school, puberty that is, not sex education…that was introduced rather late in my opinion (14).

So what age do you thinks the right age? Should it be taught early or introduced after primary school age?
Also would you prefer to do the talk yourself or leave it in the hand of the school to cover it? Let me know your thoughts! 🙂

4 Replies to “The Birds And The Bees…Whens The Right Time To Talk?”

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