Having two kids under two, I know exactly what you’re thinking. I’m crazy, right?
RIGHT! ha ha.
I always knew that having two kids with such a close age gap would be challenging and my god wasn’t I constantly reminded in my pregnancy.
“Oh you’re going to have your hands full with two”
“Oh dear, you should have waited, having two in nappy’s at the same time is no fun”
You get the idea and seriously with all the negativity that came with it I really did dread the thought of having two by the end of my pregnancy, it also put a huge downer on what should have been an exciting time for us. I often wondered how I would cope with two, especially with Logan hitting that tantrum stage and me having doubts on my parenting and if I would be able to love my second baby as much as I love Logan.
So we are currently 2 months into having two under two, I’m still alive, we’re all still alive.
Having two under two really isn’t that bad, I won’t lie there are tough days but them tough days would have been tough anyway with just the one child. With Logan being that typical naughty toddler who is exploring his boundaries daily I was bound to have challenges ahead. He is HARD WORK.
Lara, on the other hand, I’ve got super lucky with. She is such an easy newborn. My girl loves her boobie milk and her sleep, In the early weeks, she was constantly on boob as I expected and I did at this point experience some serious mum guilt. Mum guilt for me is a challenge, I felt it almost daily. I could not play with Logan as I used to because Lara needed my full attention. I tried my best to keep him occupied with books, laying some toys out for him and even giving him a tablet to watch Iggle piggle on just to get through them clingy weeks with Lara.
Now that she’s not constantly attached to me and taking more of the world in, it is much much easier. She’s now beginning to play which Logan loves as he can get involved in trying to entertain her. He can be a little rough but it’s just heartwarming to see him make the effort with his sister and it’s even nicer knowing that he has a forever friend too!
Which gets me onto the next fear I had in my pregnancy. I feared that Logan wouldn’t like his new sibling. I honestly expected jealousy to hit us hard. The day we brought her home at only a few hours old, we introduced Lara to her big brother making Logan feel super important. He ran to her whilst pointing and shouted ‘baba baba!’ which was the sweetest thing and honestly brought tears to my eyes that he fell in love with his sister as soon as he met her. I did say throughout my pregnancy that he knew what was happening but at 16 months old people said he wouldn’t understand. He did understand and I tried my best throughout my pregnancy to keep him involved. He hugged my bump and gave it kisses every single day and now that his sister is here NOTHING has changed. He hugs and kisses her all the time, maybe a little bit too much as Lara hates been drenched from his sloppy kisses, Which I honestly don’t blame her, poor thing.
Jealously, yeah that’s pretty tough when it happens but luckily we haven’t had too many episodes. Logan is pretty good at sharing and I think now the time has passed by he loves to bond with his sister most by having boobie together. Which is super super sweet and I’m so happy he can share something that he knew was only his once upon a time. However, I struggle to deal with this and it’s one of my main struggles of raising two under two…
Yep, tandem feeding a newborn and a very fidgety touchy-feely toddler, It’s pretty damn difficult. Especially in public. When it came to feeding both in pubic for the very first time I honestly felt like a first time mum all over again. That anxiety of breastfeeding in public hit me hard but I did it and blocked out everything that was happening around me and focused on my kids. Then for the first time ever I had a stranger approach me and said “aw, he’s getting a little old for that now, isn’t he? Get some mustard on your nipples that’ll soon wean him off”
Yes, I’ll admit I am dying for Logan to wean off but I know right now even if it is just for comfort he isn’t ready so I won’t force him but it really did put me off tandem feeding in public again. I don’t mind people staring or moving away but unwanted comments I do not welcome and now I totally understand why most women are terrified to pop the boob out in public!
However, apart from that two under two is pretty great! It does have its hard days but the good days are great days and just seeing the bond the two of them have already truly melts my heart. I knew from a young age that once I have my own children I wanted them close in age. With being the youngest in my family and having a ridiculous age gap between me and my brothers I knew I didn’t want this for my own. I want my kids to grow up together sharing similar interests, sharing school years together so they always have each other’s backs. I also didn’t want a huge gap between my kids because seriously… It means getting into a whole new routine and experiencing the baby stage again and feeling all new to it, even though you’ve done it all before. Having them close together means no big changes to routines, yes I have more nappies to change and that sucks MASSIVELY, but I expected it obviously. I got lucky that my two are so in sync together I mean not only do they nap and sleep at the same time, they fart at the same time. I wish I was joking but I’m seriously not, it’s pretty weird but amazing all at the same time.
I love watching them feed together, play together and take naps together. They’re the best of friends and I hope it stays that way. These two have honestly been my greatest achievement and right now I couldn’t imagine life without them both, I honestly got so so lucky with having two easy babies to deal with. Lara has made me feel so complete. I don’t know why I ever worried about not being able to love my second child like my first, I feel so silly because my love hasn’t halved, it’s doubled.
Would I have 2 under 2 again in the future? Absolutely. Maybe not anytime soon however because I think that would defiantly make me crazy… and grey.
To my lovely readers expecting their second child, get yourself a baby carrier/wrap. Trust me! no matter the age gap between your kids this will help you so so much. Thanks to my baby wrap I can feed Lara whilst still running around a play area with Logan. Link to the one I use is here.